Tis’ the season! 

Or is it ‘Tis the season!

I never know where the (‘) goes.

I love SO much about the holiday season. The weather (when San Diego cooperates and drops below 60), the music, the surplus of movies, the comfort food, the joy people seem to exude, gathering with loved ones…SO much!

But the holidays can also be super annoying, primarily because it’s that season when you reunite with people you haven’t seen all year and for me, this is always met with the fun questions, “are you dating?,” or my favorite “why don’t you have a boyfriend?”

Y’all remember that “struggle” I threw in a few months back about the lady at church who asked if I was married, heard “no,” asked my age, and then proceeded with the “awwwws” and prayers? Yeah, I’m used to that. In a sense, maybe numb to it by now. I’m not a serial dater. Never have been. And some people just find every way possible to make that seem like a bad thing.

My singleness comes up quite a bit for me.

It’s one of the first questions asked when I meet someone new.

It’s the go-to conversation piece when small talk is awkwardly silent. Which only makes it even more awkward sometimes.

It’s the source of misunderstandings within friendship circles.

And it’s the mainly unspoken – but sometimes overly spoken – wonder of all in my family.

The constant highlight and focus on my single life, year after year, has me wondering if being single is really an issue?

What started as a weekly check-in to basically vent about my frustration with singleness being a plague has now turned into a curiosity about what it may be stirring on the inside. What I might be holding on to…As I’m typing this, I’m immediately reflecting back on a conference I went to this year in Nashville, Tennessee. The conference speaker asked some pretty poignant questions that feel like they could be poking at something beneath the surface…

What have you counted yourself out on that you know God hasn’t counted you out on yet?

We always want to serve God from our giftings and our strengths, but…what’s the wound or weakness that if God healed it, it would be your catalyst?

Could singleness be my wound or weakness? Am I numb to it because I’ve counted myself out already? Maybe all these “annoyances” are God’s sweet way of reminding me that HE hasn’t counted me out… Hmm…questions to consider, for sure.

What’s the wound or weakness that, if God healed, would be YOUR catalyst, friend? What caves are you fearing to enter?