Happy birthday, babygirl.

Gosh, I say it every single year (…and likely will until forever), but I just can’t believe you are another year older today. Sometimes I look at you and instantly remember a little social butterfly with missing front teeth and the biggest personality and can hardly believe she’s morphed into this long, lean, amazonian beauty with red hair, perfect makeup, and now a mini-me who carries some of that same big personality. Well, a lot of it actually. You’re an adult now! And I’m just so in awe of your little life. I’m so in awe of how you’ve grown and matured. So in awe of the talent that lies inside of you. And so in awe that you’re mine (well, you know what I mean). Scrolling through old photos of you, I found myself missing so much about you being a baby, a little girl and even a teen. I miss our lazy Sundays or our late night dessert runs. I miss the early morning carpools to school and our shared Starbucks obsession. I miss the non-driving you because I benefited most from you needing a ride 🙂 I just miss you. And I’m so proud of you. For the mama you are to Koko, for the independence you are building as you journey through your first go at hard seasons, and mostly for that dream that I know still sits on your heart — I’m here whenever you’re ready to pursue that, btw. You are beautiful and gifted and loved beyond measure, Aliyah. And I know you can do whatever you set your mind to. I wish you the best birthday celebration and the most amazzzing 20th year, love. Can’t wait to see you and squeeze you! Love you so much! Happy 20th Birthday!

Tia Mo

They say your 20s are some of the hardest years of your life. It’s a decade of discovery. A decade of growth. Painful growth. A decade of decision. Of pursuit. Of adventure. Of course, I can only say that now being on the other side of that decade, but I’m grateful for the insight. Grateful for the wisdom it produced and grateful for a good word to share with my niece on her milestone day. If you could go back and share a few points with your 20-year old self, what would you say? What would you tell them? What would you have loved to know before leaping into a new chapter of life? Here’s what I’d say (in no particular order):

Dearest 20 Year Old Monique,

1. Follow your heart. In relationships or in career. Find what you love. And then go do that. Be there. Try out new things. Test the waters. Never settle.

2. Learn to budget. And when you do that, save! Just because you make money doesn’t mean you should spend it all. Creating a budget will be the single best investment you can make in your 20s.

3. Rest. This doesn’t necessarily mean sleep, though I’m sure you’ll learn to love and appreciate sleep more than you did as a child. It simply means pause. Take time to slow down. Hustle is just a fancy word for work. Make sure you balance it out.

4. Find Jesus. Know Him. Become His BFF. Because, honey, you’ll exhaust yourself trying to find what or who He can provide in a snap.

5. Travel. Plain and simple. Go see the world. It’s big and beautiful!

6. Take care of YOU. Love YOU. Learn to spend time with yourself. Find out what offers you the best self care and then make time to do that. Often. Your friendly PSA from LoveMo.

7. Network. Make connections. They’re powerful. And you never know when your story will come full circle.

8. Money will always be there. Make memories. Share experiences. Do things that you’ll remember forever. You have the rest of your life to work.

9. Relationships shouldn’t be difficult. Not every person is meant for you. Let them come and go as designed. What’s meant for you will be. And there are 7 billion people in the world. You’ll find someone else.

10. Emotions are REAL. Let yourself feel every single one of them.

11. Move out. Out of state, or at least out of the house. Discover some independence. You’ll be extra thankful for your parents/family, if nothing else.

12. Go out as much as possible. Because the older you get, the less you want to. And when you do, it’ll never be the same. Enjoy it while it lasts.

13. Be you! Learn to be comfortable in your skin. With who you are. With all of the traits, gifts, talents, and beauty you have to offer the world.

14. Fear is a just a lie. There’s courage on the other side. So leap!

15. Change is inevitable. You’ll lose friends, loved ones and pets who you once thought would always be there. Carry them in your heart, honor their memory and be grateful for the time you shared with them.

16. Don’t compare yourself to others. You are uniquely you. One of a kind. You’ll learn that you really don’t want to be anyone other than who you were created to be.

17. Stop racing to be older. I need to say this one again…STOP RACING TO BE OLDER! Be present. Life is sooo short. And there’s so much more freedom in youth! Seize the opportunities that you have in front of you.

18. Spend time with loved ones. You’ll be grateful for that time.

19. Timelines are stupid. There’s no perfect time to graduate college. Or get married. Or have children. Buy a house, a car, start a business. Your timing is your timing. Break the mold!

20. Life will get hard. A lot. But it will also be sweet. A lot. Allow yourself to fully experience it.

<3

What would you tell your younger self? What did you need to hear back then?